Wednesday, April 29, 2009

The Miracle of Cheetos

I have a confession-I am an optimist. I don't mean the ordinary glass half full kind of person. I mean the kind of person that believes someday Cheetos will cure even the most hideous of diseases; that every person will find the kind of love they desire-the kind of epics and internet romances; that everyone can be the weight that suits them best-plus size, skinny or in between. I believe in a world where people care for one another enough to let others succeed, without petty jealousies and back stabbing.

It's hard to be an optimist while listening to the news. Corruption after diasaster after bailout, the country I love seems to be going to Hell in a handbasket. What's worse it the overwhelming sense of powerlessness I feel, as one little Jane in Montana. Who am I? What can I do? Did I really make a difference just because I went to a Tea Party?

It's funny how life gets in the way of our dreams of youth. I always thought I would be famous, important, noteworthy and I guess in a way I am: famous to the chickens and horses that come chase me down for food every morning like a hoard of autograph seekers after a movie premiere; important to my kids, who notice when the laundry didn't get done or when the cookies come out of the oven; noteworthy to my husband, who sees me the way I was when we met at 23. It's all a matter of perspective, of optimism.

I love my simple life. I live on a farm. I have no neighbors. My solitude is my sanctuary. But lately, I can't help but feel it isn't about me anymore. Times have changed, life has changed, values have changed and so I must change too. I must take this Pollyanna attitude and the fire in my belly to make the little Jane voice heard. I must proclaim to the establishment in Washington their arrogance is not a value we hold dear, their contempt is not welcomed and their disdain for the principles of our fore-fathers must be purged. This Jane believes in America, believes in the values on which this nation was founded and believes we, as a movement, can make a difference. We will take this spark, nurse the flame and feed the fire until, one by one, we have created a bonfire of patriotic revival for the America we love.

That's what I intend for my blog...even if no one reads ignite the spark and fan the flame of those of us who want to take back this country from those who would sell it to the highest bidder. We must and I believe we can.

I have to believe. I am an optimist.

The First 100 Days of Marketing

I have always been enamored with marketing, the idea of creating an image that could eventually sell ice to an Alaskan. The brilliance of jingles that stick in the mind and logos that convey million dollar messages have the magical qualities that transform our lives. Does it really take more than three licks to get to the center of a "Toostie Pop” or will the world really never know? Are we really “In good hands with Allstate"? And who can forget how many all beef patties go with the special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions and the sesame seed bun? Bill O'Reilly may call it spin but I see it nothing short of brilliant!

It is also the genius behind the first 100 days of Barack Obama's Reign. The Obama team are masters of wrapping the message in a package. Look at just a few of the accomplishments-There are so many, how can we narrow them down:

• War on Terror is a term no longer used. Overseas contingency operation is so much more palatable. (Just what these operations contingent upon- Terrorist activity?)

• The more tolerant image of America around the world-given via the “We’ve been arrogant” speeches around the world and the selling of America by calling it “Cooperation” and “Oversite”. We are, as you know, citizens of this global economy….

• The environmentally friendly Cap and Trade package that penalizes the "95% "of Americans who will allegedly get tax cuts with higher prices and more taxes, al the while giving the well connected the ability to opt out of the program through the purchase of “Carbon Credits”. (This worked out well for Al, why not for Barack?)

• The “transparency” of the Obama Administration – Oh, sure, they put the legislation on their site for all to see. They just had the night crew post it. If you chose to sleep, rather than read it, that is not their fault.

• 8000 earmarks sold under the guise of “shovel ready stimulus projects” rather than those dastardly things we promised to eliminate on their first “real” budget..

• The Trillion Dollar Multi Phase Stimulus Package-I did use the “T” word here because, let’s face $787 billion plus interest….you get it-It’s a pill we must take in order to cure the sickness of the economy

• Releasing our “diabolical Republican” methods of getting informationcaterpillars and all-to purge the past 8 years of Bush/Cheney tyranny from the collective consciousness (As if any of us have really forgotten about the calls for heads to roll because we didn’t have the intelligence to thwart 9/11)

• And…my personal favorite…using a scalpel to cut 100 million dollars from the budget…Please children, don’t do this at home. Leave this to the professionals.

The magical part of all of this is the “Right Track/Wrong Track” numbers that are going up…yes, up. The fact that a majority of We The People feel the country is on the right track after we’ve given away our sovereignty, mortgaged our futures, sold our energy souls to the neoliths and sacrificed our national security, all under the guise of “Change-Hope-The New American Image” is an amazing feat of marketing genius.

So, for Obama’s first 100 days of Marketing, I give the team a “AAA”…How could I give them anything less? The Obama charm offensive puts even the most talented Hollywood Public Relations Gurus to shame. This slide of hand has distracted us from understanding the policies that will bode ill for generations. We have instead be given images of Bo, the playful, shoe chewing the First Dog, the everyday thriftiness of the White House Recession Garden and the blinding hope that this man who speaks so well has sold us the ice we “really” needed.

Marketing, spin, illusion-call it what you will. In a land where image is reality, Obama has sold us a very neat package.

I wonder how long before buyer’s remorse sets in?